Archive for January, 2012

Which are you in favor? Same attracts or difference attracts?

Me and by beau don’t share same principles in life. I based mine on my experiences while his is on others’. He loves reading so most of his ideals are book-based. And we often make a beautiful argument because of our differences. It is like he is more idealistic and I am more practical. Though we aren’t much more the same, bluffing what we have for couple of years will just go nowhere.

He doesn’t like watching tv coz he believes it only gives pessimism which I don’t agree. I love watching TV series, while he don’t. He has a lot of unlike that I like. From thoughts, ideology, people, ways, etc. and I so hate it coz it seems he wouldn’t make an ally.

But rather than looking the downside of the variations, I must say that there is always a way when we want it badly to be ok. I cannot compete with what he loves to do but I can embrace with the totality of positive reception. I for once tried his ‘craziness’ and he has tried mine. There were some that pleased me but there are also that didn’t. The good thing is, I even appreciate him all the more with his cool crafts.

The edge of contrariety in attitude, character, or any interests might complement you with each other.  You will absolutely have fun acquainting what his world looks like and you get to learn stuffs that aren’t in your radar. Isn’t it pretty that you have a lot of things to talk and learn to? For us to understand more our partners, we have to at least be in their shoes for some time. I don’t think that there is any harm in trying. And to have a fair play, you can also let him wear your pump heels so that he can be more thoughtful next time. =D



Read Full Post »

Don’t get addictive to your partner. I have known a lot of relationships ended because they thought they have more pain and despair rather than love. Many have asked me how I survived for many years without doubting any uncertainties that arise in my relationship. Oh well, basically it depends on how you see the connection between you and the relationship per say.

When you love, it should be aiding and not killing you. It should not be painful to the point that you feel like it is crushing more your excruciating heart and slaughtering  your sanity coz if that’s so, then there must be something wrong. =(

It’s totally normal to want a relationship to last, but to assume isn’t fair. Because the more you expect, the more it will get noxious. And, there would be a probability that you will forget your own goals  ‘coz you will keep on whining about your frustrations.

I always take myself as my priority coz everything I do is a reflection of what I will have. And, I never considered being obsessed with my relationship.  I don’t wanna be infatuated for the reason that I don’t want to merely depend on my partner. But it doesn’t mean I don’t talk to him about stuffs like what should he do, but it’s more on I will do my thing and it’s up to you to do yours. But If there’s anything that upsets me which needs to be talked about, I tell him. Here’s what I believe to be helpful . (spare me if you don’t agree.~wink)

Sometimes being alone is fun rather than clinging with each other 24/7. It will give you time to grow as a being and not just a lover. Sooner you will learn that your morale doesn’t depend to your partner. Never ever expect for your partner to fix your mood if you don’t want to get hurt more.

Respect each other’s interests. It’s okay to be get involved with his stuffs sometimes but if it isn’t gives you comfort, then recognize them. Don’t restrict him with his social life or interests. I for all time support him with what he does. I always tell him to reconnect with his old friends and have fun always.  My job here is just to remind him that, “hey, I think you need a break”. He is a one hell workaholic type of person. And it’s a bit annoying sometimes. =)

We often tease each other’s physical imperfections but with no offense. Though he is a bit big,like literally big, I embrace his individuality. It is always up to him or it is always up to our partners if they will change their own image. Don’t be the one to change them according you or own ideal image.

In every disagreement, always talk and compromise. Let the love do the talking and you will surpass any argument. That’s the most powerful weapon in killing fights. Be real and deal all the aspects that you think is a threat to your relationship. Don’t be deluded with the fact that avoiding the unpleasant will make you feel better. It’s a BIG NO NO! It is best to let him know than repressing it. Quarrels get extreme because of unresolved conflicts and issues that have not been dealt with from the past. So better yet resolve it right away.

Always give each other a room to grow. Always desire continuous growth for you and your partner. You will just be surprised that one day, you two are the most amazing couple in the whole universe. =D Encourage each other to for each other’s worth. Don’t fear of change, just see it as an opportunity for the better.

Read Full Post »

Intimate relationship isn’t all about romantic dates, romantic talks, romantic gestures or so. It is how you relate and understand the feelings of your partner. Well for me, being passionate in a relationship comes with tight friendship. Or i think i’ll call it PASSIONATE-COMPANIONATE LOVE. ~wink~

One ground for having a long lasting relationship is the foundation of friendship. It is best to be more than just a girlfriend. Aside from the connection that you and your boyfriend has, it is always helpful to have a different connection,which is being BESTFRIENDS. Being his bestfriend means you have the surge of desire what is best for your lover. Be more on emotional support because it will serve as your starting point.

Whenever he has errands to run for the day and you feel like he is panicking or somewhat in rush, don’t add up with his stress. At this time, he needs your care and understanding. Don’t nag as he won’t be able to bring you out for dinner or whatsoever. If he really is serious with you, he will catch up as soon as he can. (that’s what my guy  friend told me, serious boyfriends always have the thought of “catching up with my girlfriend” in the midst of his busy day).  Or perhaps leave him a note to fire up your partner rather than leaving depressing messages on his voicemail. Be like more than a friend to him, sure thing he will appreciate it more and certainly wouldn’t ask for more. When you think that he needs time for himself without you being around, give him the time. Understand that they also have needs that we can’t provide. Listen to his frustrations and hurtings, but don’t judge. If he is watching his favorite cricket team, shout with him. For as long as you are aware of what he is up to and that it won’t bring harm nor destruction to your relationship then be with him as a friend.

Read Full Post »

What makes a woman flatter is when their partner set dreams for her in their relationship. Like having babies with them, taking them into Paris for their honeymoon, building their dream house and so on. That really gives so many butterflies in women’s stomach. Isn’t it romantic? I think it really is. =D

My daily affirmation in my relationship is, “..i believe in us..”.  That’s one of the things I have a strong grip on. We may not have the luxury of time to be together (I work overseas by the way), or communicate every time I want to but having that self-declaration makes me feel relaxed regardless of the distance. If you are in same boat as I am, trust your relationship. If you can think of the challenges you and your partner had been through, I know you will get through your rocks. Remind yourself with your shared dreams with your partner. Make it as your strong motivation to live each day. Besides, even if you two are far from each other, you are taking a part of him or her with you and that’s LOVE. Just don’t mix up your emotions of wrong assumptions that most people do. You need to be strong not only for your other half but also for yourself and to those people who believe in your relationhsip. You might inspire them to be accountable in their relationship and must not rely to their partner alone.. Love is a two-process, as we say.

So, what’s your affirmation?

Read Full Post »

Go the Extra Mile

Go the Extra Mile.

Read Full Post »

How far have you gone in your relationship?

We women need a man who can see through us and understand our needs. We generally need a man who always give us surprises, presents,, out-of-town trips attention, time, appreciation, respect and…jewelries?hahaha..take out the latter. Even other women shamelessly demand for those, but the question here is.. How much have you given him for you to deserve your demands?

In my relationship, i am not the one who pulls out the effort but i demand a lot..i know it’s unfair. But I have learned how rude it is, and I’m here to share my insights. ~wink~

Remember the golden rule? “do unto others what you want others do unto you”.

Start with yourself. Give more and the universe will fill your bucket.So simply give your partner what you want and it will return to you eventually.  But don’t expect too much that it will return to you very identical. Perhaps it may be in astonishing form like more on what you have anticipated. =D  But I am sure it will return to you with the same emotions.

If you demand for quality time, give him that first.  He may not respond with that need of yours however I am sure it’s worth the wait. Wanna receive more emails from him? Send him thousands, who knows he will send you millions. Need him to understand you? Understand him first that he also has his personal errands to run.  In doubt of trusting him? Trust your feelings and have faith in both you. Although, don’t expect something coz they say it won’t come to you if you expect. But rather, expect the unexpected..=D

God didn’t meet up your path and his for just a coincidence. You are in a relationship with him right now because both of you are meant to be together. So go for that extra mile.

Love and don’t ask why as there is no need for a reason in loving someone.

Read Full Post »

No relationship is perfect. No one can also tell how long your relationship lasts or how soon it will end. But though, it is us who have the choice.  What we all need is the broadest mind and kindest heart. But you can make it your IDEAL RELATIONSHIP.

I am not perfect,neither are you. We are bound to fall into our own mistakes. Most of the time, we are easily fired up with the heat of argument with our partners without even thinking where it will lead. Don’t be dragged by your pride that you wanted to put the blame on him/her . We are at often instance fogged up by so much anger that we fail to make out the reality wherein there is no one to blame.It is just another opportunity for the both of you to grow though. And that’s one of the greatest things i learn in love. ~wink~

By definition,love is a virtue. The most unselfish emotion one can ever feel and experience. A lot of relationship fail to see this during in their commitment (unless the aren’t serious and were just playing around). If you love, you must learn to LOVE the fact of imperfection in every person. We must not expect and must not change our partner  into someone we wanted them to be. If you get to LEARN TO LOVE his/her mistakes, if you will LEARN TO LOVE the fact that like us-they are also capable of wrongdoings- you might be able to see every misunderstanding as an opportunity for growth.

99% of break-ups happened when two are arguing.. Most of the time, a simple argument gets complicated. Most women habitually serve previous argument into plate like summoning up previous fault of their partner. Yes I admit that sometimes I am like that. But I am now reprogramming my attitude not to. So you shouldn’t as well.

If you really want to have the best love story ever told in history, you shouldn’t provoke your partner for a break-up. Never decide during the heat of the argument. Think before you speak coz sometimes, it is better not to speak up than regret it later on. As they say, “if you don’t have good thing to say, then don’t say anything”.  Take time to breath and think. Be smart in dealing with difficult situation.  Don’t forget that it is always better to talk and compromise.  He has the whole thing that you stayed long as his or her partner, so don’t risk everything just because of unreasonable fight .

Men may not be expressive as women. Savor the moment when he say I LOVE YOU out from an ordinary day. Don’t question his feelings. They don’t like it. Just continue to love. Even if he has hurt you, just love him. He might be upset now but it would surely be off the next moment. LOVE is everything when you feel like there is nothing. Love more. =D

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »